First Crush FIrstCrush

Year 2000

She closed her book and looked out of the train’s window. She could see things passing by but before she figured what they were, they were gone. Even though a part of her was very enthusiastic to embark this journey, the other part of her played a bummer. That part longed to be on her comfortable bed watching FRIENDS or Full House, she wanted to go to park and play with her friends, Gossip and also continue her dance practice for the surprise birthday program for one of her friend. And now, she was going to miss the whole thing. She couldn’t believe she was being dragged to go to a wedding (apparently a 7th class girl was too young to be left alone) where she hardly knows (remembers) anyone. Even after the wedding they were planning on going to Tirupati rather than returning home. She dint mind visiting Tirupati, as after going there so many years (every year, to be precise) it felt like a holiday spot and she loved the whole feel the place gave her. What troubled her most was her stay at her cousin’s place. She dint know how she was going to spend 5 days. The only good news was one of her cousin and her best friend would join her in 2days. But what would she do for 2 days before he joined her? With these thoughts in her mind, she wished her Grandpa Good night and got on to the middle berth and closed her eyes.

Day 1 –

When she woke up in the morning, she was at the station. She tried remembering the station; she tried to jolt her memories as she was here when she was in her 4th class. She was there for a wedding that time too but that time she had a gala time. It was her maternal side cousin’s wedding and she knew all of them and loved them. But this time she was visiting her paternal cousins whom she hardly knew. She had asked her Dad if she could go and stay with her maternal cousins but her dad was adamant. He only granted her the permission to go there the last day and she was looking forward to that day the most. Some one came to pick them up and take them to her cousin’s home.

They reached home after 30 minutes or so. When she stepped out she started to have a feeling of Deja-vu. She felt as if she was there before.

“Dad, was I here before?”

“I don’t know”.

It was her Grand Pa who said, “You visited them the last time you came here with your mum”.

She saw the dog and she remembered its name, “Bunny” she screamed. Bunny too seemed to remember her. That’s when she realized that dogs never forget. She pets the dog for a while and she liked the place better already. The dog reminded her so much of her friends dog Snoopy who was the 1st dog she ever loved. She reluctantly said bye to the dog and went in. Everyone was surprised, shocked to see how much she had grown but she felt nothing. She went to her Grand mother’s (her Grand Pa’s elder sister) room and greeted her and settled there. She spoke to her grandma for a while, as she knew her more than anyone else. Her Grandma had come down to her place 2 years ago and those memories were fresh in her mind. She sat there until someone asked her to go upstairs to have her breakfast. She freshened up and followed her Grand Pa upstairs.

That’s where she saw him for the 1st time. He was leaning on the wall holding a coffee mug and sipping it. She stared at him for a while; he looked like an angel from heaven, a Greek God. Then he looked at her and smiled. His smile made her blood rush to her cheeks. Before she knew what had hit her she was all mushy and blushing. He looked away from her and wished other guests who had just entered. She felt a pang of disappointment. She wanted him to look at her and she wanted to do the same. She also started to greet others with her gaze fixed on him. Even though she tried to look away from him, she couldn’t. It was like her eyes were not willing to listen to any of her commands. He caught her eyes and smiled again. The reaction was the same. He walked out of the door and she felt like running after him. She spent the whole day waiting for him to return but he dint. She even thought for a while that he was her hallucination and he dint really exist.

Day 2 –

The next day she woke up with voices around. She opened her eyes and saw her Grand mother eating and talking to someone. She turned her face to see who it was; he was there, standing holding a glass of water with a white T and jeans. Se rubbed her eyes just to be sure that she wasn’t imagining him again. But he seemed to be real. He smiled at her again and said, “Good Morning”.

She sat up in her bed and wished him back. He went on to continue talking to Grand mother. He was talking about how he found such a huge wedding waste of money and that he would prefer a court marriage and then a party for all the near and dear ones. She seemed to echo his thoughts and was nodding her head vigorously even though no one noticed. She dint know so much about the money but she thought weddings of the people whom she dint know were a pain. After that discussion he vanished again.

“He is very stubborn, isn’t he?” Granny asked and she smiled.

The whole day she kept on bumping into him. She also started to help in the wedding preparations as much as she could just so that, she could spend some time with him. Later that afternoon she accompanied him upstairs to feed Bunny. While bunny was eating, she started talking to him. Bryan Adams song was going on in the background and her heart was beating like a jungle drum. They spoke for 30 minutes and at the end of the conversation she came to following conclusions –

1) He was out of her league. He was a lot older and smarter than her.

2) He used the word ‘Obviously’ a lot.

3) She had made a complete fool of herself

4) She needed to work on her English.

5) He looked even better up close.

Day 3 –

The next day she was being shaken vigorously by someone. She opened her eyes and saw her favorite cousin smiling at her. She jumped up from the bed and greeted him with a bear hug. She was feeling so lonely and she now knew she had the company she was waiting for. She thought may be his arrival would make her stop feeling all the things she was feeling. Later that afternoon they both along with another cousin went on a stroll and she told him everything she was feeling.

“I heard this before…. They call it a Crush. Aren’t you too young to have it?”

“I am atleast older than you”, she shot back.

“I am not the one having it”.

“What are you guys talking about”? Their younger brother asked them.

“Nothing”, they replied in unison.

That evening they all got dressed to go to the wedding hall. She was asked to sit behind Him and help him to keep a track to the vehicles following them. She was more than happy to be helping and jumped at the opportunity. She sat behind him and tried to talk but couldn’t gather her guts. Finally when she tried to talk she noticed that they were already at the Venue. The rest of evening, she spent with her cousin and talking to him.

Day 4 –

On the wedding day, she woke up and dressed like she never dressed before. She dressed so that he would notice her. She was hoping he drops his jaws looking at her like they did in the movies. She had bought a very pretty dress and everyone around seemed to like it and notice her except for him. With this disappointment she sulked down into a chair beside her cousin. He just then walked up to her and handed her a bag.

“Hey. Can you take care of this for me? It’s very important and don’t give to anyone. Give it to me when I ask for it, Ok?”

“Ok”, she said and took the bag from him.

She held on to the bag for 3 hours as if she was holding the most precious thing in the world. She dint dare move for her place, thinking that he could come around any moment and see her gone and get worried (for bag, ofcourse). So, she sat there for3 hours holding on to a bag as if it was her life.

He came to her and took and bag and said, “I forgot, I gave it to you. Thanks”.

After the wedding, they went back home and her uncles came down to take her. Before this was moment she was waiting for, she wanted to go and meet her cousins but now it dint seem as exciting as before. She couldn’t turn down her uncle too. So her dad and she packed for a day and left to her uncle’s place. There, she excepted to have fun but she dint. She felt as if something was missing. She wanted to go back. She was leaving for Tirupati the next day and she wanted to spend what ever time she had with him.

Day 5 –

As soon she woke up she told her dad she wanted to go back and he was shocked. She said she missed everyone and that was a lie. She missed only him. So they took a taxi and went back. When she reached the home she started to search for him. She found him getting dressed in formals and getting ready to go out. He left with a promise to be there soon with chocolate syrup for vanilla ice cream but he dint come back. She waited for him. They started to drive down to the station and one of her cousin whom she had grown very fond off accompanied them. She started to cry and he tried to make her smile by telling the ant and elephant jokes. Even though she smiled, there was a pain in her heart. She didn’t want to leave her cousin (whom she considered brother now) nor him. She would have felt better if she could atleast have said bye to him, she thought.

With a heavy heart and blurred eyes, she reached the station. She found him there waiting for them with a coffee cup in his hand. He smiled at her and all of a sudden a relief runs through her. He handed her a cup of hot chocolate. Just then her trained arrived, with hot chocolate in her hand, sorrow in heart and tears in her eyes she waved bye to him until he was out of site.

All she wished from God Balaji in Tirupati was that he gets the job, he wanted. She learnt that he had spent the whole last day job hunting.

When she was still complaining to her Grand Pa that she missed everyone he said –

“Out of site, out of mind”.

6 months later –

She writes to him no reply.

1 year later –

She writes, doesn’t post.

3 years later –

She mails him and he replies.

5 years later-

They keep in touch.

7 years later –

They start calling.

Present –

They are now great friends. He is her advisor and also the guy who lectures about life (considering the age difference of 11 years). She gets embarrassed every time he teases her about her stupid little crush.

PS- The girl in this post would like to remain anonymous.

PPS – I wanted to blog about Indian cricket team but dint feel like it. I thought we would be number 1 but we are number 3. We slipped down, can you believe that? Even though we won the Final it wasn’t a comprehensive win. The final was thrilling no doubt but that showed that Indian bowling isn’t up to the mark. So I am not happy…. At all. If they want to win the Champions Trophy they need to pull their socks up. They have to play likes of Australia, Pakistan and West Indies. Australia seems to be back into the grove where as, you can never take Pakistan and West Indies lightly, they can surprise you.

Sachin proves why is the best in the world :). Awesome innings…. wasnt it?? It was his 44th ODI hundred.

PPPS- I am shocked that FED has lost :O.